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Funny Story Contest

Last post 11-30-2008, 4:10 PM by Zenith. 20 replies.
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  •  11-07-2008, 6:25 AM 805997 in reply to 804945

    Re: Funny Story Contest

    it was a few weeks ago

    sven the dm was trying to annoy us becase he was bored and kept geting his phone to play the ff victory music

    and whean i asked him to stop he said my sorcerer woke up in hospital with AIDS!

    he wouldnt let me reroll till he died 4 ingame weeks later (at least the rest of the party visited even if it was so I could enchant thear stuff)

    to avoid this I now have to play as a warfourge but wouldnt you know it a loadstone marauder in every dungeon (i tryed being made of iron wood to but i got termites somehow?)

    16

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  •  11-07-2008, 7:51 AM 805998 in reply to 805997

    Re: Funny Story Contest

    I liked that story so much I sent it around to the other IT people.  You'll have to share more stories sometime scarvexx.

    I pronounce scarvexx king of the funny story thread for the day.


    Richard M.
    Grimfang
    "Whisper"
    Xaeraes
  •  11-09-2008, 8:37 AM 806065 in reply to 805998

    Re: Funny Story Contest

    thank you that means a great deal to me, but I was hopeing for advice on how to stop him or at the very least that ff monotone victory of death

  •  11-17-2008, 2:21 PM 806516 in reply to 806065

    Re: Funny Story Contest

    I certainly wouldn't suggest doing this being a law/good gentle being myself but wouldn't it be a shame if somebody removed the battery while the DM was in the kitchen or bathroom attending to personal business.  Or if the phone ended up in the back of some dresser drawer underneath somebodies underwear and socks.  I would never condone such acts of mischief but...............well little electronic devices are so versatile these days, how do we know it didn't morph into a were rabbit and flee the scene and all of your players silver holy symbols. 

    ) Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.
  •  11-30-2008, 1:54 PM 806722 in reply to 796843

    Re: Funny Story Contest

    here are a couple, in no particular order

    okay, so it's my third campaign as a DM (The first two ended quickly with the deaths of the parties, so its nothing to brag about) and im doing a city adventure. after one character gets jailed for starting a barfight, the other two decide to sleep in an alley. midway through the night, they get attacked by a single choker. during the battle, the elven rogue dies. After the battle. the Human paladin decides to to take the elves clothes, place the elf and choker as if they were hugging and sticks the choker's tentacles in the elf's mouth.

    during my first campaign, two characters had scaled to the top of  a mountain. on the way down, one decided to make a sled out of a tree. he cuts one down and strips it of it's brancehs. Deciding this was good enough, both players sit down and start sledding down the mountain. i decided to make them roll to see if they can control it. They fail miserably and go tumbling down the mountain with one ending up a bloody lump (the other was a minotaur so he was still concious). the minotaur takes the bloody lump to a healer who agrees to save him for all their money. While his buddy is healing the minotaur becomes a lumberjack.

  •  11-30-2008, 4:10 PM 806732 in reply to 806722

    Re: Funny Story Contest

    Well, at least my players don't want each other to die.  It happens anyway.

    I was playing an adventure, just me and my two siblings, sophomore and sixth grader.  My brother, the sophomore, was handling two characters, and I the fourth.  The first encounter was three dire rats and a bunch of giant rats.  They beat it easy enough, and managed not to contract filth fever.  They seemed pretty lucky, so they were confident when they picked the third tunnel out of four.  I didn't think it was a bad choice: a level two encounter for a level one group didn't seem too bad.  How wrong I was.  They faced four, count 'em, four drakes: two guard drakes and two needlefang swarms.  My eladrin wizard was almost instantly killed before he could unleash his area effects on the swarms, and the rest of the characters could do nothing about it.  My brother rolled four sixes in a row.  How is that possible?  The needlefangs kept dragging them down and slaughtering them.  I gave them as many breaks as I could while still being reasonable, but it didn't help.  Finally, they were all dead, except my sister, who was dying.  By some blessing from Pelor, she managed to roll a 20 on the second death saving throw.  The drakes had gone (I didn't want them to be eaten, though that is what should've happened), so my sister dragged the three dead bodies to the town, where the cleric of Pelor used her three raise dead ritual scrolls to bring them back.  After two encounters, they had all died.  I decided that the cleric should travel with them from now on.


    Zenith
    Lance Camelot
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